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nakakainis.. nakakairita.. nakakayamot.. nakakalungkot.. nakakaiyak... nakakapagpaluha.. naka! grr

Monday, March 28, 2011

Can you take this silence like a pill so I can breathe again?
I've been trying to ignore the best part of you.
But I'm still hoping that I'll be with you somehow, somehow.

Please be home tonight.
I'll die if I don't get a chance to make this just right.
I'm sorry but I can't forget about the way I feel,
Every time you're here.



♫Hopeless Love♪Daphne Loves Derby♫




One day..
i opened my PC. some loading stuffs keep me waiting.
i put my flash drive on and wait until its light bulb blinks into red.
my hands are shaking as i hold the optical mouse. i know what i just saw. but i'm curious. i didn't see it clearly when i first saw it.


i opened the flash drive of mine, i slowly point to a folder double clicked it. scroll down to the bottom. i pick a random file. browse random files. then i feel that i'm getting closer into it. my pointing finger starts to weaken.


then poof!
there it is. i studied the document/file/whatever. information flows by the use of logical freak-ness of me. 


my eyes is now half-open.
the heaviness of my chest were pushed into the fullest.
i can hear my breathe so loudly and i'm running after it.
my world just smashed. i shouted her name.
then.. whaaaaa...
why in the world i search for it?
it's full of regrets.i'm hurting too much. :((


i now consider myself as broken.
i fall into pieces, and get so weak.


i looked at the file and waited for a magical changes.
but nothing moved, nothing changes. through the sadness i had.
i pull the plug then go to bed.in the bedroom, i'm looking to a streetlight until it brought me to nowhere. imagination and wrong thinking pushed me to a deeper level of irritation and deeper sadness.


i found myself sitting in the middle of a darkroom.
and a spotlight over me.


i need someone to talk to.
i mean i need a friend to talked into.
it's either tabs, trufriend, mentor, bezy o besprend.
for i trust this people. :|


hmmm..
broken po, hindi emo. ;(

Live
Love
Forgive 
Never Give Up


Falling in the Rhythm of God’s Love
Rockin’ and Believin’ in JESUS
Walking with God

iBLoG
i Believe Love and Obey GOD.
sëbäjïsökä.029
►naka!◄

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CORNY!

Sunday, March 20, 2011

i'm in the corniest season of blogging!
my posts lead me to one topic since February.
guess what topic it is?
i know you know it.
come on don't be shy.
just say it out loud. 
yeah. you're right.

are you thinking of me as a corny type of person?
well, think of me. I'm going to corrupt your mind.
this is my blog, not yours.
judge me if you want to. although you don't have the authority to judge but does it matter? no. so it doesn't matter if you're a judge or not.

haha! galet?. I'm not angry, this is a joke. get it? no?
hmm.. told ya i'm CORNY! XD

Live
Love
Forgive 
Never Give Up


Falling in the Rhythm of God’s Love
Rockin’ and Believin’ in JESUS
Walking with God

iBLoG
i Believe Love and Obey GOD.
sëbäjïsökä.029
►Boy Bawang◄

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Running!

Sunday, March 20, 2011

she always have a speech of untrue stories in a funny way
but it hurts me hardly when it's something i needed to be angry about.
it's like an oral report in a topic you're so unfamiliar with.
under the ceiling.
on the left side, about an inch from the edge.
in front of the skyway and about 1 meter away to the right from a chair is me.

i remember when you left this chair last week.
it's seems like it's the same scene. you're in the highest pitch of your anger.
i looked at you as you go away. i stopped for a moment.
a light came out from somewhere in the speed of 299 792 458 m / s.
i run. run after you. in a play speed of -50 seconds. the place turns to black and i'm running. still running. after you..my right hand on forward reaching your shoulders. then everything became normal.

except for the intense feeling as i said will you stay with me tonight?.
poof! 

this place never fail me. the air flows from the sky. it's so refreshing.


Live
Love
Forgive 
Never Give Up


Falling in the Rhythm of God’s Love
Rockin’ and Believin’ in JESUS
Walking with God

iBLoG
i Believe Love and Obey GOD.
sëbäjïsökä.029
►run like a wind◄

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I'm not gonna cry, no.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

so how do i start?
with a song again, or a picture, how about with a quotation?
or with the title itself. CRY!


neh!


at a time i was  talking to her, it was one of the most ear-breaking-moment i ever felt. she just wrapped her arms around me then in a snap, it's gone.
no words came to her mouth as i speak then she just blew me an angry voice wearing her angry face. i feel so down as i looked into her eyes, i can't find anything that can cover the salt-water from my eyes. it seems like i'm a criminal in a guilt of killing millions of Centillion (contains 303 zeros) of living creature.


it was the first time that i felt that way.
i'm in the midsection of the falling out, my mind runs slowly, the RAM just crushed. my chin were down on the table, i'm looking at her to see her reaction.
and i can feel my heart bit through my wrist and shoulder.


i looked around to push my tears in so it won't fall but it's no use.
i stare back at her. and i'm getting lost in the gaze of her eyes.
the clock's minute-hand went round and round. i'm still in the gaze.
she covers up her face with her cute hands. another round for the clock's minute-hand to round. i saw her teeth. she smiled at me and i smell happiness.


my tears were on the cliff of my eyes. the smile prevent if from dropping down.
and there's a new set of tearing tear. i know i can get through this. 



Live
Love
Forgive 
Never Give Up


Falling in the Rhythm of God’s Love
Rockin’ and Believin’ in JESUS
Walking with God

iBLoG
i Believe Love and Obey GOD.
sëbäjïsökä.029
►T.T◄

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