I said previously that I wanted to make you happy. That's what I've been doing, but I'm really bad at saving and aiming for that happiness and that goal that we both want.
It's undeniable that pressure circulates over me and it pains me that I can't do anything about it. I know myself and I'm not sure how can I overcome things.
I tried several things to make changes in my life for a better me. But I can't live up to the expectation, my own expectation.
It seems like for every failed attempt to be better, I'm sinking down the ground, looking vulnerable. And seeing people succeed, reaching their goals, getting married, having a family, make me really happy and really sad in sync.
I mean, I, beyond any doubt, am happy about their lives and their success but at the same time, how can they do that? Why am I not like that? What are they doing that I'm not doing?
Insecurities scattered all over the floor and thoughts of not being enough skyrockets.
I hope that you're willing to wait as I pull myself together and figure things out. I hope for more patience and understanding.
//WillingToWait //sebajisoka
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